The Journey Continues

So I'm not pregnant.

I really don't know any other way to put it.

I went this morning for my blood work and it came back negative, when my nurse called I already knew it wasn't positive because I went online and checked my lab work. What happens now is I have to wait until I get my period then I will go in and speak to my doctor about my last cycle. Go over my blood work and ultrasounds, we will then discuss what we will do next cycle to make it a successful one. Not that this cycle wasn't successful it was in terms of me responding well the medicine but that's about it.

I just found this website called "999 Reasons To Laugh At Infertility" and I came across this post called "A Letter To Your Unborn Baby" and I have to admit it completely states how I feel:

Dear Baby,

As I anxiously wait to conceive you, many thoughts run through my head. Will your head be shaped like a test tube? What if they implant the wrong embryos into my uterus? What if I accidentally squirted you out into the toilet bowl? Sometimes I wonder if you will ever be real. I’ve been a bad mother already – having the occasional drink and missing a Folic Acid pill or two (or three). I’m sorry I’ve turned your nursery into my beautiful walk-in closest but I had no where to put all of those shoes. Daddy really wants you to come too so mommy can stop being an emotional wreck and ruining his marriage. After all our fertility costs, we might not be able to afford to send you to college, buy you new clothes or even feed you but mommy and daddy still love you very much. And no one (but child social services) can take that away from us.

You are worth the wait.

With love, your parents

So that's all I have for now. I will post more in a few days